Sometimes, it can just be about having no-strings-attached fun in the sack — you know, casual sex. That's what hook-up culture and sexual liberation is all about! The key, though, is being respectful. Players have to lie to get what they want. A playboy can get what he wants with the truth. So, if you want to have your hookup , don't hesitate. Just treat her fairly and honestly, and be upfront about what youw ant. Yes, drunk sex is one of those things that sounds fun in theory, but in practice it's often a sloppy, messy disaster. Right in the genitals. Emily Morse, sexologist and host of Sex with Emily.
Also, how likely are you to remember to use a condom when you can barely remember your room number? Trust is an important component when it comes to taking a girl home. Too much emphasis on sex too early in the conversation can take you from 0 to creepy in no time at all. Also, comfortable is key: The more comfortable in the situation you are, the more comfortable she will be.
Nothing else to think about! Your only focus for hooking up is your own pleasure, so what's there to worry about? Allow yourself to let go of your worries and stresses, and just feel. There's no subtle hints to pickup or try to read, hookups lay it out on the line because there's no reason not to! A playboy can get what he wants with the truth.
Remember to maintain balance and don't overdo it, says Williams. Many women fear being judged for having casual sex, so the key is make sure not to do anything to lead her to feel judged or slutty. Of course, if she resists your attempts at physically escalating, back off. A surefire way to seem like a creep is to rush her into sleeping with you, says Valentine.
Sex should be fun — and that should include everything leading up to it the conversation, the foreplay and everything that comes after the post-sex chat, the hug goodbye. When she remembers her night with you, you want her to think of it as a fun adventure.
If you're in the mood when a potential hookup contacts you, then why not? Everyone needs to get laid, and if you're single but not quite ready mingle, then hooking up is the best possible way to get what you need! There's nothing to overthink about, so don't let yourself get carried away with "what if's" and other stresses. Just have sex and have fun! Going into your very first hookup can be a little bit daunting, though, and we get that!
We have some suggestions on what kind of mind set to have, and things to keep in mind when you're getting ready for your first hookup. As long as you can be chill and take things as they come, then you'll be good. There's no pressure, and nothing to stress about, so don't! If you're not into something, or you change your mind, then just don't do it!
It's really that simple. But if you are into it, then jump in! Never go into a first-time hookup with any expectations.
There's no need for them, aside from the obvious things that you would have considered before you agreed to the hookup. These things being stuff like if they seem legit, safe, and things of that nature. There's a reasonable expectation on both of your parts that you each aren't complete and total creeps or weirdos, but aside from that, throw all of your potential expectations out the window. Nothing matters aside from sex here, but you want to feel comfortable sleeping with this person.
There's no need for dating expectations of any kind: Will they like me? What if they think I'm boring? None of those things matter whatsoever as long as you can satisfy them sexually. That's the bottom line when it comes to hooking up, whether it's the first time or the tenth time you're doing it, that the sex is there and that it's at least decent. Never go into a first-time hookup thinking that you two are going to start dating, because you're only going to be disappointed.
First and foremost when you're hooking up, first-time or not, you need to enjoy yourself! If you're not having fun and enjoying the experience, then what's the point? Allow yourself to let go of your worries and stresses, and just feel. Get caught up in the sex; play with fantasies, explore things that you've never tried before! But the minute that hooking up stops being fun, even if it's in the middle of your first hookup, then it's time to stop.
Once the fun stops, there's no point in continuing. If you get bored with one hookup, then move onto the next! That's just as much apart of enjoying yourself while you're hooking up than anything else! This is more for later on in your hookup experience, but it still applies for the first one. If your first hookup is boring and has zero game in the bedroom, send them home! If you're not getting off then there's no need for things to continue, and you don't owe them anything, so don't think that you have to get them off before you kick them out either!
Overthinking is your worst enemy in pretty much any part of life, but especially when it comes to handling a first-time hookup. It's almost impossible to be present in an experience when you're caught up in your own head, and there's nothing to overthink about with a first-time hookup anyway. Are you attracted to this person? Do you want to have sex with them? Nothing else to think about! There's no subtle hints to pickup or try to read, hookups lay it out on the line because there's no reason not to! You're both there for sex, end of story. Just greet your hookup when you see them, enjoy some idle chit chat, then get to it!
No need to waste time, you both know what you're there for. If you're nervous, you can tell them, and they'll make the first move.
It's pretty obvious you're about to hook up for the first time, and you feel all types of ways. Nervous? Yes. Excited? Of course. But you might. It's crazy how much information someone can get, just when they know your first and last name. If you want to go by your first name? That's cool.
You don't have to feel coy or try to impress them with anything but your skills in bed, so don't worry about conversation topics or anything else that you might think about for an upcoming first date. First hookups and first dates are not the same things. There's no need to panic before your first hookup, you'll be fine!
You've had ex before, and sure, you've never had sex with this person before, but that's part of the excitement! There's nothing riding on this, so you can just let loose and go crazy; experiment with things that you've been too shy to try with partners, try all kinds of new things! Your only focus for hooking up is your own pleasure, so what's there to worry about?
Find people you're attracted to and want to have sex with, and make it happen! It gets a lot easier after the first time, which is why the first time hookups are usually done through online sites. When you're looking at how to handle a first-time hookup , just remember to stay calm, and enjoy the ride.
Keep your pleasure and satisfaction at the top of your focus, and you'll have a hell of a night during that first time! If you're still not ready, we have a ton of hookup advice to help you get there, including how to turn a random hookup into a summer fling! This is the very first section in our guide and it deals entirely with hookup advice we'll get to sex advice, dating advice, and relationship advice in our next three sections.
For reference, we are speaking about the kind of hookups that can be defined as " instances of people meeting, casual sexual encounters ". Check out the list of hookup advice articles below and click their "read more" links to be automatically directed to the full pages. Ah, the big one: If you do not know what sex is, you probably should not be on this page in the first place, but Sex is defined as, " sexual contact between individuals involving penetration, especially the insertion of a man's erect penis into a woman's vagina, typically culminating in orgasm and the ejaculation of semen ".
And that, exactly, is what our Sex Advice section is all about! All you have to do is scroll down to check them out and click on the "read more" links to see the full sex advice articles.