Speed dating still comes with its fair share of challenges so keep these tips in mind before delving into the game. Speed dating is appealing because it does not require that you dedicate an entire date to someone that you have realized you are not interested in during the first few minutes. However, at the same time speed dating relies on powerful first impressions. Be mindful to ask the right questions and say the right things.
Prepare material beforehand so that you are not fumbling for things to say. Be different and stand out from the men around you. Speed dating can make you feel rushed. When the time is up and you are to move onto the next date, do not get lost in the shuffle and scurry away without saying goodbye. This gives women the impression that you are just there to meet anyone, not taking the time to personalize each individual encounter. Take an extra 30 seconds to tell her that you enjoyed your brief time together. This move alone could be the difference-maker.
Many people get the impression that if you have resorted to speed dating that there may be some quality that makes you undesirable. This is far from the truth and a big misconception. While on each of your dates, maintain and exude confidence. Speed dating is the perfect way to maximize your time and increase your chances of meeting someone that gets your heart racing.
You have plenty of qualities that make you attractive and dateable.
If you are in such a predicament yourself, here are some tips for you:. Instant attraction and chemistry level are based on pure appearances. So, pick an outfit that compliments your physique! Nothing too daring or too fancy! Just something that you know it looks good on you.
Come to the date prepared with some topics of conversation and ideas of where to go and what to do. So, do any of you have any tips as to making a good first impression in a speed dating situation? How can I make the best of this? I'm an administrative assistant at a state agency, and I'm in my mid-twenties. A lot of what we do at my workplace is confidential and so I really can't tell people about the nature of what we do.
I really don't have any sort of long-term career plan right now. My job does a good job of paying the bills, and I'm satisfied with it right now. But when the question "What do you do? I don't want people to think that I don't have any ambition, or I have no plan, or I'm stupid. I'm not phrasing it really well. BTW, I meant no offense to other admin assistants. But is there another way I can answer the job question when it comes up?
Like, a nicer way to say "administrative assistant"? Thank you all in advance. It automatically kind of shuts off flow of conversation. Just talk about whatever field you are assisting to what end, vaguely. I don't know about the best content for discussion in such events, but I think being proud of what you do or at least confident when you discuss it and comfortable with your life is far more important than the actual words you use to describe it.
That about sums it up. So, what was the best book you read last year? I'm not thread sitting, just answering jayder's question: I'm a big person-- fat, if you want to be blunt. In all fairness, I have lost quite a bit of weight since I've last gone speed dating. I'm still big, but there's more definition than fat now, and my co-workers and fellow gym goers have commented on the weight loss. I'll probably be coming to the event straight from work, so I'll be wearing a nice blouse, black dress pants, and nice shoes.
If the weather were nicer I'd be wearing a skirt, but I can't do tights and knowing the weather here, we might just be in the middle of another polar vortex anyway. I have a pixie cut.
In a speed dating you only have about four minutes to create a fun and enjoyable conversation and to make a good impression. That is exactly what the focus of. However, at the same time speed dating relies on powerful first impressions. Be mindful to ask the right questions and.
I think you need to reconsider this. Even if "a lot of what you do is confidential," such as working for a public defenders office or working for an agency that administers state benefits, you CAN usually tell people about the nature of what you do. Do you have a security clearance?
I urge you to reconsider this because I think you may be coming off a bit weirdly. People for better or worse find it easier to connect with others who talk about their occupations. People are fascinated by work and jobs. And I think -- for better or worse -- that larger women are going to be at a disadvantage at speed dating events which are geared to highly superficial judgments.
So, to succeed, you need to really shine in conversation and by parrying the most natural of questions "what do you do? Re tights, I just picked up a pair of amazingly cozy tights--fleece inside--made by Hot Sox. It seems like they'd work well even in chilly weather. Re work, I'd probably say 'I work in x agency or in y department at x agency,' say something general about why you like it, and if they ask for more details, say you work with x and y officials doing office work.
It seems like worrying about giving the 'best first impression ever' might be a little counterproductive and stressful Or try physically acting like you think a confident person would, which can help your brain go along with the idea and relax And if you don't know what that means, then spend some time exploring it. Speed dating isn't about convincing them to like you; just be yourself and see what clicks. Don't worry about knowing any facts about them.
Don't ask them what they do personally I find that rude and narrow minded, since we are all so much more than what we do. Concentrate on getting a feel for the person. Trust me in a 10min conversation, this is all you will really learn about the person, and it is the most important. Did they put you at ease, did they feel warm and friendly, relaxed etc.
So instead of focusing on yourself, focus on making them feel as comfortable as possible. Not weekends, pick like a Tuesday or a Wednesday. Because people with active social lives are too busy Thursday-Sunday.
Be very picky about where in the city you will attend the event - you want close to downtown or wherever 'the scene' is in your city. I've found that these two things are the biggest factor in having interesting people come out. The rest, as they say, is just luck. Me, I've done SD a number of times. Only once was it fruitful - I met someone who later became an awesome friend, who then introduced me to more people that have also ended up being great friends. But not once has it ended in a relationship.
Not even a piddly one-month relationship.
So get your hopes way way down. This will also help your nervousness. It's just a chance to have some after work drinks and chat. The job question is tricky, and it seems like the easiest way around it is to deflect, which you can do precisely by pointing out that so much of what you do is confidential-- just say something like "I work for the state.