Immediately after splitting up, a period of time apart can be helpful. Let yourself spend time away. It will allow you to focus on the best ways to reconnect with your ex and be a part of his or her life once more. It's a very good sign if your ex is the one making first contact. Perhaps they are doubting their choice to break up. If this is true, they may call or contact you some other way just to say hi or check how you're doing. Mind you, being the first to initiate contact might land you in a position of weakness.
If, however, you get a call from your ex after a few weeks, see it as a good sign. It's quite fair to assume that they have had time to consider their feelings enough to have a change of heart. A face-to-face meeting is hard to avoid if your ex comes around to get their things. See it as a positive sign. He or she may see it as a rather innocent excuse to come in contact with you. If they still carry a flame for you, they won't be in a hurry to have their things back and may even leave something important behind so they have to come and retrieve it.
If you want your ex back, never offer to return their belongings. Once that offer is made, you have cut any tie with your ex. Take it as a very strong sign of interest every time your ex initiates communication. It can indicate that they miss you. As hard as it may be, you must work on making them miss you. If you initiate contact, it may appear that you are chasing them and they may only reply to your messages to be nice.
If this happens, take a step back and stop all communication immediately. See how things go from there. You may have contact through mutual friends, such as at a party. This doesn't necessarily mean your ex is checking up on you, but their body language will tell what you want to know. Do they keep glancing at you, and does their body tend to angle toward you? Do they mirror your movements, laugh when you laugh?
Your ex may not be certain about how to act around you anymore. They may keep their distance after the break-up. If your ex boyfriend or girlfriend always talks about him or herself, you could see this as self-centered behavior. It is also possible that they are just comfortable around you, which is a good thing. Maybe not right away, but they certainly do not want to see you dating other people.
The best case scenario is if your ex is worried you are dating someone else. This opens up many opportunities to turn your relationship around. If they only call you to get their things back, that is a bad sign. But if they call you one day with no straightforward reason, such as to ask about a family member or mutual friend, then they just wanted to get in touch with you. More than anything, this is a great sign that they want you back. Take it as a very good sign also if your ex calls you just to get your opinion about something. Nobody who didn't care at all would bother to call an ex about something trivial.
If your ex calls you in order to convey this message, they want to get a reaction out of you. They want to know how jealous you are. If they are warm with you, they may be trying to mend things. Look at it this way: Your ex would have absolutely no problem looking you in the eye if they simply didn't care. If you're ready to work for it, you may be able to turn the relationship around. The key is to look for the right moment to make things happen. One of the signs your ex wants you back is a change in behavior. Some attitude changes may be immediate, while others take a bit longer to take place.
Be on the lookout! There's no reason you and your ex can't be friendly around each other. But look for a radical change in the way they treat you. When you meet, is your ex extremely happy or extremely moody? If they are happy, it could be that they miss being with you. If they are moody, it could be that they regret ending the relationship. They may only be looking for sex, but it could mean something more. Show your interest by flirting back, but be careful that you both have the same intentions.
How are you doing? They feel remorse over the breakup and are afraid that you are dating someone else. By asking how you're doing they are fishing to see whether you miss them. Any future dating plans? They deeply fear the moment you'll say you're ready to see other people.
At this point your ex is doubting their decision. You could easily sway them back into your life at this point. Keep it to yourself. Intimacy after a breakup is very tricky. It may seem like an innocent thing to do, but it can actually be a big mistake. You are in contact with your ex, you see each other every so often. Maybe you're even friends. And, cherry on the cake, you're sleeping together again. They have what they want with none of the pressures of an actual committed relationship. Sleeping with your ex on a regular basis isn't the best idea.
However, it does let you know that your ex is still interested. Having sex once or twice in a moment of weakness and passion may be a positive thing. Flirting or even making out with your ex is a good sign, but only if your ex initiates. The more interest they show in you, the better the chances of getting back together. Misinterpreting their intentions could get you hurt. Content is for informational or entertainment purposes only and does not substitute for personal counsel or professional advice in business, financial, legal, or technical matters.
Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites. You will just frustrate yourself trying to help her and you will not get any result except wasting your time. That's why I said you should inform her parents or her friends to get her professional help.
Its completely difficult of stopping myself not contacting her. I wish before I started my NC, she reply to my text and I will tell her that I still care for her but you should get professional help I want to tell you that me and my girlfriend both are 20 years old. Sometimes she send her pics to me, sometimes after 7 days of not talking to her she text me like begging that I want you. But now she is much colder right now. Before 1 month she is talking about breaking up but she still told me that I love you and I don't know why I am doing this.
But Now she said to me coldly that I have made my decision to lead my life lonely. When I asked her if you love me? Her depression is now becoming out of control After you told me that this is due to depression. I realized how badly I treated her I never take her depression seriously Kevin You're right I am completely frustrated right now. She is not replying to my texts I don't know right now what to do. If this is happenning continuously I am afraid It causes nervous break down to me Now As you say.
I am starting no contact period for 2 months.
I really don't know what I really got after that. I hope everything will be fine after that. During Nc if she initiated contact to me. What should I do then??? If she texts more than 4 times, tell her you need some time and space to deal with the breakup. I just want to tell you, Kevin that me and my ex had a great time in past months before the breakup.
I still want her because I deeply love her. I am following your emails and your advice and it greatly motivated me. And if yes then how much?? It is sad to understand that even after sticking to rules, after fighting with your self everything can end. At first as everybody I talked nonsense "I will do anything for you So it was a first hope and believing in NC rule. We met and did go shopping again I sticked to the rules - no talking about relationships, being funny etc. Again everything seemed to workout.
Couple of days ago she asked me to bring some medicine that I took when we separated, after 8 years , but it was just saying "whenever we meet accidentally, remember it's mine". And I wrote back the same moment that I can bring her drugs today. Then it all happened - she told me that I shouldn't have any hopes over our relationship, it's over and she wishes me the best and that being separated is better for both of us and we will find our true love.
So it is sad, not always rules work. But during NC rule I felt really great, although everything I did was for her, but it was new stuff etc. I am sorry about that. At least you tried. At this point, at least you know you gave it your best and you fought for her. But perhaps it just wasn't meant to be. And there is definitely someone better for you out there.
Dude are you kidding me really bringing the woman drugs you now you could have went to jail for that anyway if she doesn't like you for you and she is just using you then that means she is only using you for drugs and she doesn't know what she is doing with her life and she doesn't know what she is doing with you because she is the only woman that you could have went to jail because of her. Kevin I need some advice. My ex girlfriend and I dated for two years. We talked about our future together, met each others family just hung out almost everyday. She broke up with me because of my insecurity.
It's been 6 months since we've been separated. So I admit i begged her for the first 5 months big mistakes. She has told me that she is not ready for a relationship because that she is always busy with school. All the begging I did annoyed her so I backed off. I don't even contact her anymore working on myself we keep in contact via she always initiate contact. So a few nights ago she called me and asked how I feel about us being separated after that we talked for hours about just general stuff. I made a mistake of asking her about getting back together since in my head i felt like i had made my changes of being more confident and less needy.
She told me she doesn't want to be with me because she just doesn't feel the same due to all the fights we had that it drained her. I got upset about it and it showed which wasn't good on my part. However, she says I'm a good guy and that she loves me but isn't in love with me. So i wondering is there still a chance and if so what do I need to do? Our birthdays are in two weeks her birthday is literally a day after mine.
She wants to spend our birthdays together like we always have been doing so what do i do? Thanks in advance your emails have been doing wonders for me keep up the good work. Do NC for two weeks. If you think you are ready confident, not needy, accepted the breakup etc. If not, tell her you need space and time continue no contact until you are ready.
Hi Kevin my ex texts me everyday I try to go for days without talking but he draws me into conversations that are like pieces a puzzle that I can't decipher, I can't tell if they are negative or positive I get hi sexy I get compliments on my looks I get "we are complicated " and I get daily have you looked for a new job did u get a loan? He wants me to pack up and follow him back to Sydney where we spent 12 years now given I want him back this should be great but I don't know if his girlfriend is going too he doesn't want to live as a family , is it a test?
Or do I no sure when you get rid of your girlfriend. There are children involved its a big deal. Can't believe that I have ended up posting on here but here goes anyway. I am a 49 yr old single parent and after many years of independence I met someone a year and a half ago.
Even tho we are very different we absolutely fell for each other, he asked me to marry him and I said yes but we decided to leave it for a year to be on the safe side. He moved in by default and everything seemed fine.
Christmas was hard, he became very distant but couldn't explain what was wrong. He had 2 quite serious family problems at he time and, as he is a man not really given to analysis, couldn't seem to talk about it. I feel as if I may have underestimated the effect on him. I felt insecure and we argued and decided we had been too hasty in moving in together so he moved out. Since then he has been progressively, ever so subtly withdrawing and I have been forced into the role of the chaser.
I have tried to talk about this, we have had breaks to sort things out Eventually he became so distant I asked him if he was seeing someone else. He said he was in a bad place and couldn't see anybody There followed a period of very mixed messages, he said he didn't have anything to give but still loved me and wanted to be with me, just not now.
I tried unsuccessfully to give him space I e mailed him but not to a crazy extent, articles about depression Then about 2 weeks ago I suddenly couldn't handle it, crazy trying to get in touch with him.. Casting dignity to the wind I asked a family member what was going on. He said he had heard my ex saying he didn't think he could make it work with me but didn't want to hurt me. He is a kind man but a bit of a coward so this seemed all too believeable and I tipped over into grief. I also spoke to his brother who said he is not talking to anyone and very withdrawn. I stopped all contact because I knew I had to break it off in my head, albeit reluctantly and with no sense of closure, which has been very hard.
I have been instinctively doing NC, seeing my friends and working really hard, about to head off camping with my sons and have cut my very long hair very short, as I had been wanting to do for years. I am still very upset and hurt, tho I am doing my best. I am scared he has been lying and has perhaps met someone else This feels like such a shock to me, even though things had been declining, because he felt so in love with me and visa versa. He changed from such a passionate, open, loving man to someone distant, with no feelings. And then I chanced upon your site.
I don't know whether I'll have the courage to follow this I am English and quite reserved in my way and this seems quite American foreign to me in style. ALso It feels like prolonging the vulnerability and therefore the possibility of hurt. I understand that I must get to a place of calm, an end to this swinging from one mood to another, but the longer he doesn't speak to me the worse it feels, as if he never really cared for me and is happy to get away. I don't want to tip over into hating him, always the easy way to end things but a heavy burden to carry.
I am going to carry on the NC but I am really scared he'll never respond. It's been 2 weeks now , tho I have phoned his brother a couple of times, but I have been sad but dignified. What do you think??? I think, maybe start the NC month from now,August, spend the summer by myself with the kids I am really hoping you can give me some support, too old for this kind of nonsense but so sad.
It seems like such a waste because i felt we had the makings of a good relationship. All advice gratefully received. My ex is continuing to confuse me , I have cut contact to a minimal but delivering kids every weekend is a challenge ,when he sees me he hugs me long and tight kisses me on the lips but also acts like he doesn't want to touch me , if I look at him he gets super uncomfortable like he can't look in my eyes, he contantly compliments the way I look but will say in one breath something like , my girlfriend makes me so happy we haven't had one single fight you are my beautiful ex wife.
I have an arrangement to meet him for dinner this weekend as a conference puts me in his city , I think he actually suggested it , but I asked if he could meet me both nights and was told no I have a date with my gf I am not changing that what would I tell her? I actually am not sure how much he sees her its been less than 3 months really not surprised if they didn't fight I'm sure she is busting herself to be perfect because he is so out of her league in looks and is a lovely guy.
Yesterday he sent me a text asking if he should take a job offer, he asked me to call in my lunch break to discuss, I did he basically wanted me to decide for him its a good career move he's not happy n his company I said go for it and he called his agent while I was still on phone and said yes, this job takes him a bit further away from me but it also takes him away from his gf, I wonder about why he relied on me for this decision, of course I'm wondering if its a positive sign, then he will admit if I text him he reads but doesn't reply. Can I say roller coaster? This dinner on Saturday will be interesting I'm guessing he will spend whole time squirming with discomfort in my presence and telling me how happy he is, how should I handle it?
I can't tell what he's thinking at all! Hey Kevin Me and my ex girlfriend dated for 6 months and broke up 3 months ago and I did no contact for about 35 days until she texted me because she saw my mother at the eye doctor and since then we have texted two more times. We broke up because I was a jerk and messed with her and she would laugh and she would mess with me by doing stuff like poking each other's sides and just stupid stuff to make her mad and now I miss her so much. But when she contacted me after no contact it was like she was different and was actually trying to keep the conversation going and that was surprising so I'm hopefully optimistic so I just wanted some advice on where to go from here should I try and keep texting her or wait for her to text me?
Thank you so much! If your in no contact then how do you know she wants anything to do with you. I don't see her or talk to her so how do I know she is doing any of theses behaviors. Is She was with someone she wouldn't tell me and I wouldn't know. Hi Kevin, I submitted a comment last week on this page. I have since found out from a friend that my ex is on an online dating site, and I have seen it with my own eyes.
He's even used the photos that I took of him when we went on holiday together. I am really shaken up about it. I want to understand why he says he still loves me and still goes out and meet other women. I know from a rational point of view that he and I are not together and are allowed to see other people. But I'm finding it hard to accept.
Shall I say something to him? Tell him that I know? I don't know how to feel or think right now. I would really appreciate your help. Hi Kevin, I'm a gay, 18, when I was in school, I used to like a boy, he was my classmate and was very caring, and warm. I used to like him, but never felt comfortable when I was in front of him and used to notice the same from his side. One day, it was school's annual function, I stepped in, and the first person I met was him, and most of the time, he was only with me!!
I was amazed at it, you know he even came back from the girl he liked. Idk, maybe I felt somehow that he liked me, so I texted him that night "I like you". And didn't get any reply! Next working day, I reached the classroom, and sat blushing. After sometime I saw him with his best friend entering the class, he stood near the blackboard and his bestfriend came to me and asked me if I actually texted him or not, I was shocked at it and found him saying "hey, I was joking" but that was late, I knew that time he didn't like me at all.
I broke all connections with him and actually avoided him for about a month. Then one day after an exam, I was waiting outside the room for one of my friend and suddenly I saw him along with his friend coming to me, we small talked about the exam, but I was feeling ashamed talking to him, so we talked really less! Then after the exams stuff, I logged in my facebook account and the first msg I got was him, saying "hi" and right from that day we used to talk everyday, there was hardly any day we didn't talk, I felt comfortable talking to him on fb, then we started meeting for his b'day or other occassions.
Still the question "does he like me? Then he activated whatsapp in his phone, we used to talk whole night, and day, but then insecurities prevailed. He said he liked a girl, but that girl never liked him, they were just friends always, he said he likes her a lot and at this thing I used to motivate him. But certainly maybe I got insecure and thought he needs gap, so had little silent fights, not replying, jealousy, sometimes I used to block him, etc.
Then one day we stopped talking and everything was going good, it took so much time for me to move on, since talking to him was an addiction and stopping it took a lot of time but I actually moved on Though I still checked his status and dp on whatsapp, I deactivated my fb account. Then yeaterday he texted me "nice dp" and I was so shocked at it, watching his message so I said "thank you, yours too" then he asked about my story which I have been working on, and showed interest in reading it Idk, I'm so much confused even now, I'm stuck at this question "what does he want!!!
I'm a gay and that's why I keep on questioning myself at it coz I don't know about his orientation! Please please plsssssssssssssssss help me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Waiting for your reply! I am going through such a hard time because I have no clue what does my ex thinks of me right now, therefore I am writing to you to have another point of view. Here is my situation: I have been in a relationship my ex 3 years ago for 2 years, it was my first love, we spoke about marriage, kids, and everything.
When I started college, I had to break up with him because of the distance. I had enough of this "I love you but I can't" situation, I started to date someone else. He got out of his mind, complained, and then he also started to date someone else but secretly no photos, no showing in public, nothing, he just keeps looking at me he doesnt talk to me and thats it.
I miss him terribly; Kelvin please from deep inside of my heart I need your help, can you please give me your opinion on this matter because it's slowly driving me insane. Thank you very much!
An ex asking if your dating anyone new can have a couple different reasons. One reason being they're The second reason could be because they are just cu. If you do think your ex wants to get back together, here are 13 clear signs to They Ask About Your Dating Life. Burst/Pexels. If your ex seems interested to know if you have a new SO in your life, it could mean that he or she is.
My ex and I were together for 7 years from school sweethearts to moving in together last year. We didn't really have our personal space anymore and I became lazy and started eating unhealthy as well as not listening to what she would say let alone remember. We split up a few weeks ago as she didn't want the stress and felt trapped as she had things she wants to do that she feels I can't be a part of. Due to financial reasons we've agreed to live together in different rooms sharing kitchen etc. After stupid arguments, drunken mishaps and being in a self pitying hole for a couple weeks I'm feeling a lot better, Ive changed my diet, I'm exercising, I'm going out more with friends etc but most importantly giving her space as she also suffers from depression which can be difficult to understand her at times.
Aside from being gf and bf for years we're also the best of friends. This past week we've rarely spoken we also work for the same company as we both need our head space and most importantly I need to keep up my regular new habits of feeling and looking better.
I do want her back, that's the heart talking. But the brain says I want her to be happy more. I live with her and work with her, how can I make this work one day? Obviously I'm fresh from the break up and she was the one who ended it, but how do I communicate in a way that doesn't make me look like a dick but also in a way that doesn't smother her. My case is rather difficult. I've lived with my girlfriend for the past 10 years and recently about 11 weeks ago she told me she ia pregant, and with twins. But I met someone about 9 months ago and although I didn't tell her about my relationship during the first six months, I had to tell her.
Since then, she was patient but always asked me when I would take the decision to leave my long term relationship. I gave her explanations that we had an investment together and that was the main reason why she had to be patient, to figure out a way not to lose what I had. When she said to me 5 weeks ago that she wanted to be friends, that's when it hit me. I was in love of the other woman! She said she was feeling agitated and asked me to leave.
Later she send me a text and said that I should mive on without her and that she was not the woman who would make me happy. I had the desire of being with her and leave my long term relationship. But I can't because she is pregnant. I treated her badly I know and I lied to her. But how can someone be sure if what he has until you loose it? I love my long term girlfriend but not in the same way I love the other woman. There is a slightly chance we might meet up this weekend at a party but don't know what to expect or what to say if she comes up and talk to me.
Or should i make the move and talk to her? My ex doesn't want to have communication after break-up. He told me to never text and call him again. Should I still hope that he'll come back to me? You can try doing NC for 2 months and contacting him again. Read the 5 step plan. If you really don't have a future with her, you should move on. She is not willing to go against her parents for you.
And you really can't do anything to change that. Ok so I got my ex back but she's managed to make me regret this. Her personality just sucks now and I'm just now realizing it. Granted I did 7 day no contact and sped up everything else I was happier by myself not having to deal with her mental disorder which I'm assuming she has now. For example she brought food in and I brought everything back to move back in She decides like 6 hours later to ask me if I put the food away I didn't flip out but proceeded in my mind to call her all kinds of dumb asses and more.
I feel I wasted my time coming back to a female who doesn't appreciate anything. I did the whole new clothes thing 7 day no contact and got rid of the stress started hanging out then talked to her and a week later thought I'd go back to being happy Screw this I need a real woman. I'll try to make this as short as i can, but i feel that there are details i should point out in order to make sense of it all, because its a little complicated.
I've been dating this girl for 2 months. During this period i have had some of my best time in a while. I know she did too. She's 22, i'm She's married, but claims that there is nothing left there for her. She says she got married too young 20 and feels like she and her husband grew apart. He still loves her, and therefore she doesn't want to hurt his feelings by leaving him and disappoint both his, and her parents since they know each other , and i believe her.
We've been talking over text msgs and via phone calls every single day since we met. It was fun, and each conversation felt fresh as if it was the first. There was a lot of honesty from her side, and mine too. It really was something special. Yesterday she sent me a break-up text.
I wasn't really surprised due to a couple times during the 2 months that she felt a little confused, and we talked about it openly and it seemed as if she got over her confusion. I know that she feels really bad about this as i think she's denying life and its surprises i didn't told her this, of course. She keeps saying " i think too much, i know. I didn't really know what to say, obviously i felt anger and that she's being a coward. I did not reply until a few hours ago upon reading some of your articles.
My reply was short and said something like "Its ok don't worry about it, its no big deal, and i appreciate your honesty. Good luck ; " 15 minutes later she replies "I know it came out of nowhere, i just started thinking about everything" hence thinking too much and "it sucks, because its not what i want, but i feel like its what i have to do. I didn't reply yet. I don't know whether to move on or not since i know we both have something really special here that i don't wanna miss out because of ego or whatever.
Kevin, i'm not even sure what my question is… just really confused and hope you could shed some light for me. Sorry for the ramble: My advice will be to move on. Even if she does decide to continue relationship with you, you are still looking at a lot of drama to finally have her as your official girlfriend. I don't really see a long and healthy relationship with her.
Even though you might feel a special connection, you must understand that she is cheating on her husband and that means she is not faithful. Whatever her reasons might be for cheating, it's still cheating. She is not honest to her husband. How can you expect her to be honest to you IF she ever becomes your official girlfriend. Thanks Kevin, you're reply was hard to read because you're prob right. I think ill take your advice and move on Hi kevin, My ex and i had been in almost three years relationship, yet on the bridge of my graduating period three months ago, he just broke up with me because of having no time with him because of my requirements in school.
And on that time he had been entertaining another girl that he call as friend, of course as a girlfriend, ill be jealous. For the last three months, ive doing things to win him yet its not working. So i decide last week to give him the 30 day no contact rule. Do you think i'll still have the chance for him? He contacted me after 3 months, and he was joking around how if he won a car race with me I'd have to move in with him forever..
But I don't feel he's interested in me.. He is very cold. You will see him. You can limit contact with him only to greetings. And if he tries to talk more, just tell him you need some space and time to deal with the breakup. We were together for 9 months. It was rocky, and he cheated in the beginning. I forgave him and he really tried to adjust his behavior. It was very romantic, and I became pregnant. He was pushing for marriage but I miscarried, two weeks later he asked "can I see other people but not lose you?
Now I'm in need of help. My NC 5 weeks time is over, my ex kept trying to contact me relentlessly for the first 2 weeks. Email on the 3rd. Week, later just fb "likes" and comments. I emailed him to say Hello, and to ask for an ultrasound photo of the baby I miscarried -I deleted it with all his mail and photos. He answered and sent it to me. He also asked about my wellbeing, said "I think about you a lot, with a smile". I told him I want to hold a little memorial for the baby, and he wants to come.
He then proceeded to send me several phitos of our happy times together, saying how he loves me, and how happy we looked. I told him the pics were beautiful but we should leave the past where it belongs. After that he has been very cold and taking hours to answer any emails. I called him and he picked up right away.
I told him he can come as long as he can be kind and write something nice for the memorial.
No idea if he is coming or not, but I will not call again. I wonder 1 Should he really be invited even though he abandoned me as soon as I miscarried? Thanks for your answer. The send off will be this Sunday afternoon. At the same park where we had our first and last date. I think it was right for you to invite him considering it was his baby too. You have finished NC and you are probably in a much better place emotionally and mentally. So, I'll recommend you act friendly to him.
He will try to remind you of the times you were together. And perhaps try to woo you. Let him do it.
Don't put up your walls. But don't get intimate with him unless he commits. The memorial went well, he did try to woo me, but I put up my walls. He did display all the symptoms touch, remembering good times, wanting to do things about "us" said he loved me, missed me but days later, we sadly we got into a rehashing the relationship on chat.
He maintained loving me, and working on himself. The rest of July and August have been distant. Mostly me making contact and him taking a long time to answer. If I don't contact for a week he would contact me with a reminder of the good times. I saw him 2 weeks ago and he kept trying to hide any serious dating -he knows I found out about a colleague he started seeing 2 weeks after the breakup. Again he was teary eyed about us, showed me photos, twirled me on the street and hugged me for a long time -I kissed him and he reciprocated, but said he's still figuring out himself.
Then last week, I stopped by his place to pick up a pkg while he was traveling he knew. There was clear and sad evidence of another woman our decorations gone, another's intimate stuff, etc. He voice messaged me on whatsapp days later to cheerfully let me know he's seeing someone "consistently", and "I want us to be close, but it might be hard", he called me by my pet name and added he's noticed last week "you're moving on as well" -I was at an event with an old ex, who was tagged on fb. He then sent 5 more messages during that week letting me know how his relationship is with a new woman 2nd.
Finally, he called and I calmly and happily wished him much love and understanding. How though I'm dating , I'm taking my time and not rushing things with my old ex, for he is a wonderful man I respect. He tried to address the apartment findings and I just said "it was a good thing for me as it helps me feel more comfortable moving on physically". I cut the conversation short, as I was getting ready for a trip. I'm starting to feel detached. Please give me your advice, what is playing at? In times like these is a great help to get objectivity without criticism.
I find there's help and empathy. Especially if you have started dating as well and are hoping to move on. Unfortunately, no one can say for sure. A good way is to give yourself a time limit. If you still want to be with him, set a time limit for yourself months. If he doesn't make a commitment till that time, cut all contact with him and move on. I understand, and is painful for me. I've gone on dates, but I'm nowhere near moving on. I have strong feelings for him, and of course I would like to get him back, but not by turning into a doormat. I only wished him the best to regain some lost higher value in the midst of his messages, "showing him that I'm ok with the breakup".
Yet I'm upset this is his second rebound relationship in such a short time. I ran into my ex today we broke up only a few days ago while I was running and he was walking in my direction. We were both surprised to see each other and I gave a small smile and kept running I had my headphones in. He smiled and tipped his hat and kept walking. Should I have acted differently? Should I have talked? Does this break the 30 day no contact rule, since I know I am going to see him on Sunday but I am not planning on approaching him?
Hi Kevin, My girlfriend broke up with me just over a week ago. We underwent a break of several days before hand, in which she told me it gave her the time to think about what she needed. We broke up and she said she wants to be friends, then see where things go from there.
She has told me right now, there is more of a chance that she would date someone else as opposed to me, since we've been broken up for such a short period of time. I think my difficulty is that I have changed all the things about myself which was the reasoning behind her breaking up with me.
I have been friendly and seen her once in two weeks. I just don't know what to do. I want to get back together but at the same time, don't want to put excessive effort into this if she's going to date somebody. She said she has no intentions of dating someone between now and September, but she said after that anything's possible. She's not ruling out the possibility of us getting back together, but certainly won't confirm it either. I've decided to stop talking to her for those 30 days to let myself heal and focus on what I need.
Please offer any advice you can. Hi Kevin, please can you help? My ex and I have been in touch for about 2 months now, first it was a lot of texting - light chat, jokes, he mentioned the break up and relationship and I calmly responded to him, he talked about how he was making himself better, setting himself up for the future and family I said I still loved him, and after that text he called me a couple of times and we chatted on the phone, every day topics. Maybe you should pick at his brain until he hates you and then he'll really want you and grow up and be a confident and self assured person.
So, if you don't want a relationship with him, why ponder on why he's asking if you are dating anyone. I wonder if you are being honest with yourself. Originally Posted by Mack I held the "virginity is special view" for a while, but in all honesty, I just wanted to experience it. Nothing more, nothing less. And if you think that I'm headed towards a life of terror because I experienced that with someone I didn't love, then I don't know what to tell you.
I appreciate your input, but being judged for an action like that isn't what I'm interested in I simply wanted to know reason why an ex would even ask questions like that. Originally Posted by geegirl. Originally Posted by Infnitysign. I wouldn't judge how a women losses their virginity because it might just be circumstantial or just in the moment. My ex GF lost her virginity to her BF before me by rape and it was so hard for her to even come to contact to me.
But, I know if I asked him directly, he would contradict himself, like he usually does. I know strangers, such as yourselves do not have the exact answer, because obviously I am being honest with myself. I have slight feelings for this guy, though I shouldn't. I like the conversations and kissing, but don't want the complications of a relationship. You have to understand that the man still has an attachment to you. The curiosity to know if you're with someone else will be there because they were once a part of you.
I am sure there is still that sense of belonging, even if the two of your are not together anymore. The thing is, his question is also followed by the fact that he is moving on with other women. I don't think it's a competition but more so a curiosity. And even if it meant that he was jealous of the fact that you are moving on, he's not doing anything to hold you back. If you want to continue "just sex" then do so but don't do it if you're still emotionally tangled with him, even if you just enjoy his conversations.
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